LoLTarzaned

Tarzaned · @LoLTarzaned

14th Feb 2018 from TwitLonger

The Final Chapter


I made one of these a while ago... and I'll be honest with you... I was being serious. I had no intentions of going back to my negative ways both in game and out of it. It just came to the point where I had no self-control and my emotions would always get the better of me no matter how hard I tried.

I basically saw the internet as a joke and would do whatever gave me the most entertainment possible. The more time progressed, the more I realized that these are actually human beings I am messing with and I now understand how to be a better person. I was a twenty-three year old individual harassing teens on the internet on a video game for my own mere benefit which seems repulsive to think about. People thought I was mentally ill, physically abused in the past and a lot of other things. I simply laughed at the fact but now I understand what they meant from their perspective.

Out of all my permanent bans related to toxicity, this was the first one where I actually read the chat logs. It had to be the most pathetic thing I had ever seen. I would ask for open, blame someone the moment the game started or just stop caring about the outcome of the game.

When I claimed and maintained rank one in Season Six, yes I know my role was broken. My account was fresh off a two week ban and I just got bored always getting banned and having to get a new account. I managed do something no one thought was possible.. finish rank one in the most competitive season of the game (physical rewards in challenger for the first time, where I received none of them). Never during that period did I think about one day going "pro" or being a prime role model for junglers around the globe. Ever since season six, all my accounts just get to 600-750 LP and get banned as games become harder.

I still have an audience and supporters that I am forever grateful for and I want to shift my perspective on every platform to also allow them to adapt and grow to be both better players and human beings.

I'm sorry to the people that I have harassed, made fun of and trolled. If I can ever make it up to you in real life or online, I promise you that I will. I was going to write a list of all the people I have only sympathy towards because of the way I treated them but I realize it would be too long. You know who you are and I hope you can forgive me, I understand and respect if you don't however.

For people that think this is a "marketing" scheme, I don't know how I can prove to you that it is not, but please see this from my point of view with the kindness of your heart. I used to get way more revenue and viewership in the past and this is not a way to revitalize that. I never tried to be tyler1, this was literally who I was from the start and I think this is the best way to finish it.

None of this was an act and I continued reassuring myself that it was. It truly was not.

This game is my life. If I never have an opportunity to compete, I want someone to take the torch and represent the region in the strongest manner possible.

Next time you see me in game, instead of insulting me because of my past, I'm kindly asking you to support me and give me another chance. A few words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated. I know I have asked for many but with the professional help I have gotten from Matt alongside all the support from my fans and girlfriend, I think that it's possible to not give up and become the person you SHOULD be.

Thank you to all my supporters. Whether you be newly interested in me or here from the start, I cannot thank you enough. You guys are the reason I am still playing this game and I am so thankful to have you apart of my lives and to make this dream a reality.

There are always going to be haters and non-believers. Use them as fuel. They were right numerous times, this time they will be wrong.

Happy Valentines Day and I hope you reconsider my past on this clean slate.

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